Right is Wrong!

I don't know if I will ever get used to driving on the wrong side of the road. Heck, it's taken me a while now to get used to sitting on the wrong side of the car as a passenger, and in moments of tiredness or vulnerability I still go to step around to what you northerners consider the driver's side door.

"Oh, you want to drive?" comes the chirrup, and I go pale.

"No. No no no no no." is usually what I stammer, and beat a hasty retreat to the side of the car there really should be a steering wheel on.

I haven't dared actually try to drive yet. Everything about driving is backwards to me, save the pedal positions, I'm told. Even the wipers and indicators (we call 'em "blinkers" coz they, you know, blink) controls are on the opposite sides of the steering column, and I know I've experienced at least two periods where The Husband would be driving and the wipers would come on instead of the indicator signal - once when he was accustoming himself to driving in Australia and again when he was reacquainting himself with driving here.

I have a whole plethora of excuses I can rattle off in case anyone actually does ask me why I haven't driven yet. It's too icy, I've never driven a 4WD before, OMG snow, moose! However what it all boils down to is this:

We're going the wrong damned way!

I know this looks perfectly normal to someone from up here, but trust me, this is strange to those from my part of the world and is a scene that belongs on television or a film screen. We're familiar with the scene, but it's not quite right. Northerners, go watch Neighbours or Coronation Street (or any Australian, New Zealander or British television show) for the same sense of weird.

I know we don't wave swords at each other anymore, but it sounds more heroic to say that we left drivers do that because we predominantly right handed warriors needed to be able to get access to and use our weapons rather than the rather boring reason of "we used to ride on the back left horse of the dray team when hauling freight as it was easier to pass on that side".[1] Left side drivers are warriors, you righties are teamsters. Which seems more impressive?

I think what it all boils down to is that I'm terrified I'll be driving along and suddenly realise I've just gone past ones of these:

Pic from freefoto.com

I've heard of so many foreigners going up the off ramps in Australia. In fact, I believe I'm related by marriage to at least one of these. I don't want to reciprocate here. Yet worse, I know that sooner or later I'm going to have to deal with one of these:

Pic from freefoto.com

And I thought roundabouts were bad. *shudder*


[1] http://users.telenet.be/worldstandards/driving%20on%20the%20left.htm